“The chief cause of human errors is to be found in the prejudices picked up in childhood.” — Rene Descartes
I read this quote again today. It really occurred to me how my actions, words, judgement on others really has an effect on my children. I took some time to reflect on my parenting in this area.
In my opinion, society comes down hard on kids. They are labeled, removed from schools, kicked off teams and sadly sometimes, kicked out of their own homes. Although it is quite easy to point the finger and place blame solely on “delinquent kids”, the question is, where are these kids’ parents and how and why did these children end up in like this?
Being a parent, I realize more and more each day the responsibility I have and the impact I will have on my children’s life. What are my morals like? Do I forgive them so they learn forgiveness? Do I love unconditionally so they learn to love unconditionally? Do I offer grace so they in turn can offer grace to others? Do I accept to them so they may be accepting of others?
How do I treat my friends? How do I treat my husband? How do I treat their siblings? And what about respect? The answers to these questions is where it starts for me. If I’m complaining, gossiping, being rude to them, their dad, their siblings, I set “the stage” to allow for that behavior and treatment to others. The kind of language I use will be the kind of language they use. And how hypocritical is it if I scold them or ground them for behavior or language I myself am using?
These questions hold me accountable and help me to be a better parent. Clothing and feeding my kids is one thing, teaching and being an example of a good human being is another.
Was I always this way from day one in parenting? Good grief, NO!!
I have come a long way and at times white knuckled it through the change but I tell you, when I look at my kids now 15, 17 and 20, I am proud of them and myself. I see today, the benefits of those changes.
Parents, we are our children’s first teacher. The road we travel ultimately plays a big part in their lives. For me, becoming aware and understanding the gift I have been given with my kids and accepting my role in life, helps me to be a better parent and in return I am better able to let my kids go out into the world with confidence :)
Behavior change takes practice. It starts with our thoughts, words then action. For me, I got here one baby step at a time. (I’m still crawling in some areas ;) ).
My hopes for you readers today, may your day be filled with so much love and happiness. For today is a great day to be the best you can be :)